Golden Power Energy Drink

Frequently Asked Questions

1. QUESTION:
   Can someone help me with editing the first chapter of my book?
   Black Palms
   Mike Tkachuk

   PREFACE
   The feeling of regret and anger washed through me as I watched the world of artificial happiness turn into a dark and morbid place. If I could go back to the beginning I knew I would not have done things differently, but I wished someone would force me to a stop. The friends that I once thought I had, I have not seen for what I think was over a month. I have had thoughts that I was on the wrong path many times, but I threw those thoughts away and enjoyed the absence of life that I was undergoing.
   The golden sparkling spectacles that represented sand were turning into fiery charcoals. The green grass that was exactly ten meters away from sparkling ocean water was turning darker and darker and the ocean itself was not filled with water but the reflection of all the bad and evil thoughts that are going through my mind. It wasn’t only my haven changing, it was also me. I felt all the happiness that I previously felt running through my veins leave completely just to get replaced by demonic thoughts and wants, no not wants needs for more.

   1. LIFE REMAINS LUCID
   The wind is gently blowing the warm but cool air as if it was making a countdown for me to jump back into the warm pool water, surrounded by teenagers of my age. This is what I live for, the loud music playing in the background, the alcoholic beverages being passed around as if they were candy, not one person has had too much to drink, but we all are at the point where shyness is not a problem and energy and fun has corrupted our minds. As I take three long strides and make a perfect dive into the refreshing but warm water, I awake.
   I should have realized that one person’s reality is my dream. As I stretch I realize that the worst reality has just entered my mind, today is the first day of school. A feeling of anger and mostly sadness runs through me, giving a heavy feeling on my chest. I get up and grab my asthma breather and inhale. As I take a couple of deep breaths I force myself to stand up. I walk toward my window and all I see are groups of friends walking towards the school bus engaged in descriptions of the summer fun they had. I close my eyes and repeat the same words I have repeated since grade school.
   “Just a little bit more”
   As I say these words I once again gain a little bit of power. I only have one year left of high school and then I can make my own life, things will change. The one thing that paid off for not having many friends were the good marks that I was receiving, which are supposed to lead you to a better future, but that meant little to me, I would at anytime trade my three point seven average for a couple of friends and a hangout spot.
   I walked toward my dresser and browse through the large pile of clothes I have. Clothes were never really the problem, I buy a new wardrobe for every single new style the kids in school start to wear. I already got this month’s style through the deep observations I make, usually out of my window due to the fact that I don’t get out much. I put on the jeans that no longer are too large or too tight for me, and an expensive shirt with many interesting designs. As I walked down the stairs of my three story mansion I could hear my parents already engaged in an argument, I have learned to ignore this because of its frequency, wondering why they have not had a divorce yet. I have not even shed one tear in my life for their fighting, it has never bothered me, they were never much of parents to begin with. All they did was drive me to school and make me food, I don’t even remember the last time we had a conversation lasting longer than a few minutes. As I walked into the large sun roofed kitchen I noticed the maid has already laid out my favorite cereal, I slowly poured the chocolaty cereal first followed by the milk. I looked at the clock and let a minute pass by letting the cereal get the right amount of moisture and sogginess.
   “Let’s go I’m going to be late” I yelled hearing the echo that has begun to annoy me long ago, hearing a premature voice is not always fun especially when it is your own.
   As my mother walked into the kitchen I noticed that her soul was crying but she was holding it in and keeping strong, my mother was a strong women, she has never depended on anyone else including me and my father, I think the reason why she is not the loving mother you see on television is because she has been through things that people only see on reality television. We used to be close before she became the vice-president of her realtor company, she told me many stories of her childhood many including her not having a home to live but still going to school and getting everything out of life she needs.
   I put on my four hundred dollar Nike sneakers and walked out the large wooden door. On my drive way sat 3 luxury cars and a small sports car I was promised if I finished high school with an above three point five average. Lurching side to side in my mother’
   for the rest of the chapter tell me through e-mail, any help would be greatly appreciated.

   • ANSWER:
     I'd cut out the preface entirely and start with chapter one. Unless you can make it more vivid, or perhaps briefer, it's dragging down the beginning of the story with a solid paragraph of angst that doesn't seem to lead anywhere. If you want to establish a feeling of regret, set a short scene maybe, or incorporate it later. As it is, it just seems too repetitive.

     As for your first chapter: You switch back and forth from present tense to past tense. Get this fixed. Your first sentence shows that you don't have a firm grasp on the active voice; if you don't know the difference between active and passive voice, do some Google searches.

     Your sentence: The wind is gently blowing the warm but cool air as if it was making a countdown for me to jump back into the warm pool water, surrounded by teenagers of my age.

     Fixed: The wind gently blows the warm but cool air as if it is making a countdown for me to jump back into the warm pool water, surrounded by teenagers of my age.

     "This is what I live for, the loud music playing in the background, the alcoholic beverages being passed around as if they were candy, not one person has had too much to drink, but we all are at the point where shyness is not a problem and energy and fun has corrupted our minds." This sentence is a run-on. Break it up. Shorter sentences are good for the beginning of a book, moving the reader quickly from one sentence to the next.

     Grammar aside, I wouldn't recommend starting with a character awaking from a dream. Bad bad bad idea. We've all read it a million times, and you want your book to stand out.

     The chapter continues with the main character going about his daily life... Still nothing here to entice the reader to continue. Character dreams about swimming with friends, character wakes up, character puts on clothes and eats breakfast. Where's the plot? Where is anything of interest?

     Write a better hook. Cut out the angst; less telling, more showing.
     Don't take this critique too harshly. Focus on improvement. There's always room for it.
     Good luck and keep writing!

2. QUESTION:
   what happen if goku mix with superman?
   HI EVERYBODY! I am so tired of arguing about goku vs superman .Why don’t we create another character that even stronger than both of them.Let imagine:
   One day, Dr.Gero go to Marvel Universe and meet Lex Luthor.They had a plan to RULE ALL UNIVERSES AND DIMENSONS BY COMBINE GENES OF GOKU AND SUPERMAN TOGETHER TO CREATE KENTKU( clark kent and songoku) who has HALF SAIYAJIN AND HALF KRYPTONIANThere is his Known power:
   He possesses all ability of goku and superman WITHOUT WEAKNESSES.
   He haS superstrength,superspeed,supervision,superbreath ,superstamina and durability and absolutely invunerable body etc.
   Strength:
   _Superman can lift 40 billion tons and move a planet
   _Goku has UNFATHOMABLE strength ,can gather his power to his hand and also lift a half city in ssj4 without focusing power.Besides that , at the begin of dragonball z , piccolo showed that he control his mind to move up and down a pyramid which would have taken over 2,300,000 blocks of stone with an average weight of 2.5 tons each. The total weight would have been 6,000,000 tons and a height of 482 feet (140m).
   so Kentku can MOVE A SUN By combining BRUTE STRENGTH , KI ENERGY AND INCREDIBLE TELEKINESIS.
   Speed:
   _Superman is 15 times faster than speed of light.
   _Goku is wayyy faster many many times speed of light at his ssj3 form and instant tranmission which can help him jump from galaxy to galaxy a distance of million years of light in INSTANT.
   Kentku can move at the speed that both goku and superman can see HIS SHADOW.
   Fighting skills:
   _Superman has been trained by both Wildcat (in Boxing), and Mongul in the fighting arts. He has also learned more advanced martial arts techniques from Batman.
   _Goku was a GENIUS FIGHTER ,a master in marital art even fight the stronger enemies many times.He studied a lot of kungfu and special skills form Master Roshi-who is the strongest human in his time.
   Kentku can fight both superman and goku contemporary.
   Invulnerability:
   _Superman can survive in supernova explosion ( 10 000 000 degree )and indestructible.
   _Goku can keep up with Kid Buu who is stronger million times than Raditz that can survive in nuke explosion without a scratch.
   Kentku can stand against 80 % a power of SOLAR KAMEHAMEHA which can destroy the entire solar system completely IN SIZE OF A TRUCK.But he will be MASSIVE INJURED even he has a energy sheild.
   Note: superman can survive in supernova exposion and was knocked unconscious but compare him to the sun , he is like an ATOM TO A SOCCER BALL so he is only burned by 1/1000 000 000 destructive power of sun exploding at MAX.
   Eyes’s death beam:
   _Superman has heat vision and super vision that can see everything except lead in atom level.
   _Goku after drinking ultra divine water , he can see Piccolo daimao’s face who is about hundreds of kilometres far from him at Korin tower.
   due to saiyajin’s gene, Kentku can shoot green kryptonite ‘s laser through his eyes and was not weakened by any types of kryptonite.
   Saiyan transformation:
   _Kentku can transform to ssj3 with a tail and with the feature of kryptonian ,he can stay at this form without getting tired.
   _Kentku has a tail that help him transform to GOLDEN GREAT APE but he can control his mind LIKE VEGETA and NO ONE CAN CUT OFF HIS TAIL BECAUSE OF HIS INVULNERABILITY.
   _With HEALING FACTOR and ZENKAI techniques ,like PERFECT CELL,HE can challenges everyone.
   _He can survive in space ,absorb solar energy and with SAIYAN’S GENE,he won’t be weakened by RED SUN OR MAGIC.
   _Like goku , he can SENSES KI and has TELEPATHIC.He also can READ MIND when he touches anyone’s head.
   In conlusion, i think he is completely invincible.Can he will be defeated by anyone?GALACTUS???SSJ4GOGETA??? OR GOKU FUSES WITH SUPERMAN ???Or Goku must marry a female kryptonian to bear a half-breed man that can against him.PLEASE TELL ME YOUR FEELING ABOUT HIM!!!

   • ANSWER:
     Nerd.

3. QUESTION:
   So I'm gonna need some help here. It's for a story I am working on, and I need to know if it sounds good.?
   So, I am working on a new story. I know for a fact that originality is pretty damn hard to come by these days, but my goal is to try to make this as original as it can be. Though I probably won't get many answers, if you would please read through this and give me your opinion, it would be greatly appreciated!

   So the story starts out with a girl named Achyuta Seiza Zethin. She died, and an angel named Ryuda brings her back to life. The only way she can 'pay him back' for the great gift that he has givin her, is to take the Nanaryu, a bracelet -which stands for 7 dragons- and add 7 dragon stones as 'charms' to the bracelet. Ryuda can not do this himself, for he is an angel, and his spiritual energy is too weak to walk amongst the humans.
   Hmm this will go long.. so why not speed it up a bit?
   Achyuta heads to a town called Gretali, where she gets mugged by a drunk dude, then Zaid Mezos Avrataj (the other main character) saves her. She travels along with him (him unwillingly) because she sees that he is strong. Zaid has immense spiritual energy. When he was born, the devil wanted his soul. Zaid's mother sacraficed herself to save him. He now lives with a curse. A curse that whenever he shows love, his blood will curdle, which is incredibly painful. The devil takes power from Zaid whenever this happens.
   Blah blah skipping details.
   A man named Kabiito, who weilds the Ignatzio, a powerful fire sword, will summon the devil on Zaid's 19th birthday, his golden year, kill him, and the devil will rule the world. So basically that's the jist of it. Just the main plot I've got going in my head so far. What do you guys think so far?
   Please answer. It's really important. Like. OMEGA important.

   • ANSWER:
     Your story is Omega interesting. Let me see.... Um.... Why wont you make Achyuta Seiza Zethin help Zaid. Then the curse vannished with a single true kiss from her. Isn't it cute. (I'm just giving an idea. If you dont really like it, I'm okay with that.But anyway, your story is facinating. Keep on the good work) Bye.